The Near Side: 18 Ways to Say You Fell Off Your Horse

If you tell someone you fell off a horse, it sounds like something potentially tragic happened. But if you instead say that you ate dirt, it sounds sort of fun and lighthearted. Maybe that’s why there are so many euphemisms for falling off a horse. It’s just more pleasant to discuss an unpleasant event when you can use a creative expression to identify it.

Our Facebook friends contributed their favorite examples, and I’ve picked a few of their creative suggestions to highlight here. So next time the unthinkable happens, don’t say, “I fell off.” Instead, say…

1. 1. I bought real estate
   2. My horse and I went our separate ways
   3. I performed a random gravity check

4. 4. I had a free bone density check
   5. I had a flying lesson
   6. I flew Air Equestrian

7. 7. I had an unscheduled footing inspection
   8. I visited Dirt City
   9. I had an assisted dismount

10. I had a dirt facial
11. I became a lawn dart

12. 12. I used the emergency exits on Air Pony
    13. I performed an equine-assisted aerial maneuver
    14. I exited out the side door

15. 15. I had an unscheduled dismount
    16. I bid farewell to fine leather
    17. I’m in a transitional relationship with my saddle

And finally, sing it with me…

18. “I fought the lawn and the lawn won.”

Thanks to our Facebook friends for their creative contributions. Check out the full list here. Have another one to add? Leave it in the comments.

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